and/or, by definition, offended: dictionary meaning: “adjective – resentful or annoyed, typically as a result of a perceived insult.” There is also offensive as in, dictionary meaning: “causing someone to feel deeply hurt, upset, or angry.” Which is not to say I am incapable of being annoyed, upset or angry – I easily, and often, feel those but not on a personal basis.
You can call me by a derogatory term/word which will say more about you than me. So – you’ve just showed yourself up for what/who you are. It’s no skin off my nose.
You can comment on my appearance – and again, if true, then five will get you ten I already know it. If not true – ask me if I care what you think.
Attribute to me some quality that is less than admirable – and again, we are in the ‘if true I know it, it not, your opinion doesn’t matter to me” territory.
Now this was not true when I was young(er) – just ask Jimmy Quirk.
So – being called fat? Yup, you got that right – and? Do you think I don’t have a mirror or that I don’t know my pants are size XL?
Being called a cold-hearted bitch? I can be when it’s warranted, I have been, but in general, no. If you think so, you don’t know me very well and I doubt you will ever get the chance. Your loss; ho-hum; fluff off.
You see where I’m going with this, right? I don’t need to give you anymore examples.
Also – the notion about being non-judgemental. Hmm – I don’t think anyone is – not if they are being truthful. Making assumptions based on superficial information is gonna happen – to all of us, a lot of the time. Don’t lie! Whether your assumption and/or judginess falls into the negative category – that’s a whole nuther ball of wax. I’m trying to think of a somewhat innocuous example and I’m hard pressed.
Ok, I’ll give you that we are not always judgemental, in a negative way, based on superficial information – some things just don’t register with some people. But, yes, we do react to most things we see or hear. It might be a positive reaction, or a negative reaction and we might make further assumptions based on that. Or not, if it’s not that interesting to us.
As in – I notice hair, hair-dos, hair styles, howsomever you want to call it. When I see a hairstyle that I find particularly fetching I spontaneously blurt out “I love your hair!” I can honestly say I don’t take much notice of the person beneath the hair. I don’t know what that says about me – good or bad. On the other hand, if what has caught my attention is that the hairstyle is not particularly well done, I certainly don’t say anything and I’m still not noticing the person underneath. But I’m probably thinking “Have you looked in a mirror lately?”
Funny example of that – we were watching a show the other night, the action was mostly in Antwerp, Belgium and having seen several episodes I finally shouted at the tv – “Does no one in that city own a comb?” I shout a lot of things at the tv that I wouldn’t say in any other circumstance. Also as in – “Oh, please someone throw that girl a sandwich”. Or – “You are too stupid to live” – I say that a lot while watching the news.
As always, I have no idea where this is going but I think I’m done for the moment. What’s even more interesting, to me, is what precipitated this little meander through my thoughts. BTW- the linked phrases? They’re idioms, and don’t we all just love idioms!